A night I’ll never forget. My first humiliating experience with Brazilian women.
I’d arrived to Rio De Janeiro earlier that day, and I’ll admit, I was intimidated. I barely spoke Spanish, let alone Portuguese, and I’d heard horror stories about violence and crime.
I had completely psyched myself out. I was legitimately nervous, unable to think straight.
I knew I needed to calm my nerves. This was unlike me. Maybe I was burnt out from travelling.
I got a taxi straight to the hostel. I observed the other guests, looking for a group to latch onto. That also was very unlike me, but I wanted a crew to ease my way into the city.
Eventually, I found a group. A couple Scandinavians, a couple Brazilians and a guy from Italy.
We hit the drink and got to talking. A few of us arranged plans to go out that night, so the conversation quickly turned to girls
“The thing with Brazilian women, man, is you gotta be aggressive. It’s the only way,” said one of the Brazilian guys. The Scandinavian guys were eating up every word.
“You gotta do it that way, or they’ll think you are gay.”
I chuckled, and the Brazilian guy turned to me.
“Especially you, man, you look Brazilian, man! It’s going to be more hard for you!”
I had heard this before, and it was nice to have the aggressive thing confirmed. I wasn’t the aggressive type, and that had worked well for me in Latin America, but I was ready to adapt.
Hours later, we were at a club.
Within minutes, I noticed several sexy Brazilian women throwing glances at our group (to be fair, probably only due to the two tall, blonde Scandinavian dudes).
Seems promising, I thought.
And indeed it was.
Within minutes, the Scandinavia guys got pulled into a group, leaving me, the Brazilian guy who went out with us, and the Italian guy.
“Go find something, man!” said the Brazilian guy
“I will, I will. Don’t worry” I said.
Truth is, I was the one that was worried. I was insecure about my lack of Portuguese, and I couldn’t get a good handle on the social dynamics of the place.
Luckily, I was saved from having to approach. A cute little Brazilian girl came up to the table and asked if I wanted to dance (I understood that much Portuguese, at least).
I remembered the aggressive stuff and made physical contact right away. At the end of the song, we kissed.
She went off to find her friends, and I returned to the group.
Night progressed, we talked among ourselves and I was casually keeping my eye on the cute Brazilian girl. Seemed like a good lead, but it was still relatively early in the night.
I spotted her.
Dancing with another guy on the dance floor, giving up much more than what she gave me.
“Hmm, I thought. “Seems ‘aggressive’ means ‘persistent.'”
I mentioned it to the Scandinavian guys, and they confessed that the group of girls they were with jumped ship as well.
I tried a few more approaches, but my ego was wounded – up until that point, I hadn’t been outright jacked like that in a bar or club in Latin America. I blew some conversations due to language barrier, picked up the phone number of a girl that was leaving the bar with her friends and got blown out HARD with a Hail-Mary at closing time.
Man, it was a different game here – Brazilian women weren’t just going to give it up to a lowly dark-haired foreigner from Canada.
Sorry, that story went on longer than I expected.
But it’s still fresh in my memory.
It wasn’t until the end of my trip, and thanks to the help of a friend in Sao Paulo whom I met in Canada, that I finally began to understand how to hook-up with Brazilian women. And, although I haven’t been back to the country, I’ve since had success with girls from Brazil in other Latin American countries.
How To Meet Brazilian Women
Be Aggressive! B-E-Aggressive!
But seriously. Yes, the rumours are true. You need to come on strong with Brazilian women. The game moves very fast here. This was the hardest thing for me to adapt to, as I’m usually a pretty relaxed guy.
What does this mean?
It means initial physical contact off the bat, and go for the make-out as early as it makes sense to do so (obviously don’t be autistic and just grab any ol’ girl and kiss her…although I have seen Brazilian guys basically do that…).
But being aggressive alone isn’t enough. In countries like Mexico and Colombia, my game plan was basically chat to a few girls early on, maybe get a number or two and then retreat back, either to my group, or just to the bathroom or bar. Basically, planting seeds so I’d have options to return to throughout the night. Worked well. Sort of raised my value as someone who had options if girls saw me talking to other girls, but it didn’t fuck up my chances because we weren’t touching or anything…just friendly chats to start out.
If you prefer to hook up with Brazilian women online, Brazil Cupid is the best option
I found out that, in Brazil, or with Brazilian women in general, this doesn’t really work. You do need to be persistent with the girl you’re going after, or else she’ll end up with another (more persistent) guy.
You can’t just initiate contact and leave her for awhile. Even if it’s only shooting glances or stopping by her table, you always got to have her on a string.
This occurred to me when my Brazilian friend in Sao Paulo was always asking me why I was ditching the girls I was approaching. I, of course, didn’t see it that way, but my attempt to explain to him my game plan which had worked so well in other countries? He simply couldn’t wrap his head around it.
Oh! Another thing.
Remember how I said be aggressive? Well, that only applies after you’ve approached a girl. As far as your approach goes, you’re going to want to air on the side of being respectful as opposed to cocky. Girls here are used to being hit on by drunk foreigners as well as hyper-thirsty locals. So they have a pretty finely tuned defence mechanism. Basically, approach respectfully, and if things are going well after a few songs (or whatever unit of time you’re using to measure) escalate fast. Think going from 1-10 on your approach and going 10-80 on your escalation.
If that makes any sense at all…
How Girls in Brazil are Different Than Girls in LATAM
I’m going to get this out of the way now.
Brazil is not Colombia, Mexico or Peru.
Brazil is not a place where you can show up, log-on to Tinder and have girls throwing themselves at you because you’re a foreigner.
Brazil is different.
You will have to work!
Couple reasons for this:
1. The local competition is strong; there are a lot of fit, good-looking men in Brazil. Perhaps more than anywhere else in the world.
2. Foreigners aren’t special. In fact, Brazil is constantly trying to fight the international stereotype that their country is full of easy women. Seriously, this is a thing they don’t like. So, being a foreigner may actually be a disadvantage here.
Don’t get me wrong – it’s not impossible to get hook-ups. Brazilian women aren’t particularly conservative when it comes to sex. But you’ll have to sink in some time, man! It’s not like Colombia (God-bless that country). But neither is it Argentina, where a social circle and six months in the country is basically necessary to hook-up with a half-decent looking woman…
For me, it’s a good mix. It’s not unnervingly easy but not obscenely difficult, either.
That’s the way it should be.
If your Portuguese still isn’t great, Sign Up For Brazil Cupid to meet English-speaking Brazilian women
There’s a rumour that Brazilian women go crazy for blonde-haired guys.
I’d say that there is truth to this, to some degree.
Whereas in other Latin American countries, something as simple as having blue or green eyes can make you exotic and attractive, Brazil is different. They come in all shapes, sizes, colours etc. So, it’s hard to stand out in Brazil. Even a White guy like me, with light eyes and light skin, doesn’t stand out. In addition to being told I looked Brazilian, I personally saw plenty of dudes that looked like me throughout the country.
That means that about the only racial group that stands out here is blonde guys. So it makes sense that they’d have a bit more of an exotic factor than someone like myself.
But don’t get it twisted. It’s not like a weird fetish or anything. But yes, from what I saw, blonde guys did receive quite a bit more initial, superficial attention than I did!
Bottom line. If you’re blonde, you’ll do alright here. If your not, you’ll be fine.
Online Dating in Brazil
I almost forgot!
OK, you have two good options for online dating (there are more, but these are the best).
1. Brazil Cupid
Tinder has hotter girls, but Brazil Cupid has girls that are more responsive and easier to hook-up with.
That was my extremely scientific assessment after using both apps to talk to Brazilian women.
My advice? Use Brazil Cupid and Tinder to meet Brazilian girls.
Good thing about Brazil Cupid is that it’s easy to set up dates before you arrive in the country. This is a bit harder to do with Tinder Plus, as they’ll think you’re a weirdo/sex-obsessed for swiping outside the country.
Not sure why this is.
The Best Cities To Meet Girls in Brazil
5. Sao Paulo
As the biggest city in the Americas, there is obviously no shortage of attractive Brazilian women in Sao Paulo. That in itself makes it an excellent place to meet girls in Brazil. You’ll find women of all kinds here. Black, Japanese, White, Indigenous and everything in between.
There is ample selection both in terms of nightlife, and online dating.
So, why is it only number 5!?
Well, the game here is tough, folks. The city attracts the top-tier people from Brazil. There’s a ton of competition if you’re a guy. Also, as a foreigner, you’re nothing special in Sao Paulo. It’s kind of like Buenos Aires in that sense – even though there aren’t a ton of foreigners around, the locals could really care less. So, no exotic factor for you!
Luckily, I had a friend in the city who showed me around and introduced me to some people, but that didn’t stop me from getting blown out a couple times by the local girls.
In short, good quality, plenty of options, but hard to meet.
Salvador, Bahia. A seriously cool city. It has a warm vibe and energy that’s hard to find anywhere else. Reminded me of Havana, Cuba in that sense.
If you’re looking to meet women in Brazil, you could do a lot worse than Salvador. The city has a high black/mulatto population and you’ll see some of the most gorgeous black women in the country here. They’re also fun and sexual – no room for prudes in this city!
However, two things put a bit of a damper on Salvador: crime and prostitution.
It’s a city where you have to watch your back; a place where you never feel entirely at ease. Also, there are many covert and not-so-covert prostitutes hanging around locals bars. If you’re a white foreigner, expect to get hassled. A lot.
In short, responsive, attractive women, but a dangerous city with prostitutes.
Brazil Cupid works VERY well here.
Natal was one of my favorite cities. Not too big, not to small (well, perhaps a bit…we’ll get to that later) friendly people, somewhat safe by Brazilian standards, which isn’t saying much, but still!
Approaching women here, I was received pretty well…even had myself a hook-up! People are a little more chill and less, um, Feminist than in Rio (we’ll get to that, too).
Downsides? Well, the women weren’t quite as attractive as in other Brazilian cities. Not bad by any means, but not quite up to par. That, and prostitution is relatively common here. This is an issue in Northeast Brazil in general – and as a foreigner, it’s a tough thing to dodge. Furthermore, the city might be a tad small for some. You’d run the chance of running into girls you’ve hooked-up with.
2. Rio de Janeiro
Obviously, Rio makes the list. How could it not!? The women are stunning, scantily clad and very warm and welcoming. Nightlife is very good (although not as “crazy” as you might expect…I saw naughtier dancing in Cuba and Colombia than I did here) and the beach makes for an excellent place to meet women.
Overall, there’s just an incredibly sexual and fun vibe to the place and people. It’s an impossible city to be depressed in.
But, it’s not perfect. First of all, as a foreigner, you score zero points. I think the World Cup ruined any shred of reputation non-Brazilians may have had. Second, the women can be surprisingly feminist. I got wrapped up in a few annoying conversations about empowerment and men being bad. Everyone’s entitled to their opinion, of course, but I’m no fan of being unfairly lectured because I was born a male. Anyway, this shocked me. After the first time, I was willing to chalk it up to an anomaly, but then it happened again.
And then again…
Also, the women are not easy. You’ll find you can rack up make-outs and hook-ups pretty easily, but when it comes to one night stands, they just aren’t that common here. I tell folks that Brazil isn’t Mexico or Colombia – if you want to bed girls in Brazil, you will need to put forth some time and effort.
1. Belo Horizonte
Belo Horizonte. I loved this city, the people are friendly, the women are stunning and the city is, for the most part, very pleasant. While I wouldn’t say that it’s safe, it’s generally easier to stay safe here than in other cities in Brazil. Whereas in Rio you can become a victim of crime any time, any place, in Belo Horizonte, if you stay out of certain areas of town, you should be more or less alright.
There are a number of bars around Praça da Savassi, and they are filled with beautiful, friendly women who are interested by foreigners. At least in my experience.
With a population of around 2.5 million, this city is the perfect size. It won’t swallow you up like Sao Paulo, but it’s not so small that you’re going to be running into the same people all the time.
It’s got everything you’d want in a city at a much lower cost than Rio, awesome welcoming people an incredible climate.
And, did I mention the beautiful women?
Belo Horizonte takes the number one spot for my favorite cities to meet girls in Brazil.
***If you want to meet girls in Brazil BEFORE you go, Brazil Cupid Is The Easiest Way.
Well, this post has gone on long enough.
Guys, basically all you need to know is this.
Don’t expect it to be as easy as Colombia, Mexico or Peru
Air on the side of being aggressive after a well-received approach
Have fun! Always be laughing and practicing your Portuguese (or Portuñol).
It’s a great country and I hope to go back now that I have my wits about me a bit better and have become wiser with age.
I hope to see you there.
Until next time.